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Transcript:Paradoxical Parable/16
StasisDesigns Stasis stood still and thought for a second. The team had recently ignored his plans of heading to the welcome topic to help stop the Noobs, and Insector made the mistake of leaving GameBuddy out, thanks to his inability to count higher than ten. Insector: Oh god I can't count. No wonder Noobs had taken over this place. Nonetheless, Stasis had faith in all of his friends and decided to put his plans aside in favour of the current situation at hand - DarkRyal. Using his army as a shield, DarkRyal was unattackable directly. Iceman: Any ideas? Stasis: Well, like Insector suggested, we should take down DarkRyal so that the army is without a leader. Insector: Indeed, but with all of the Noobs in our way we will need to clear a path. That way, Bit and Booze have clear access enabling them to ban his sorry ass! Bit: Seems like a good idea to me. Booze: I'd still rather take them all on by myself, but I guess I'll do it your way this time. Iceman: We'll clear you a path. You two just focus on banning him. Bit readies his ban hammer with anticipation, while Booze continues to drink... well, booze. Insector, Iceman and Stasis take their positions. Stasis turns towards Iceman. Stasis: Not turning in to an icecube? Iceman. Not this time, man. It's time I used my powers at their full potential. Iceman raises his arms in to the air before slamming them in to the ground. His arms were now coated in razor sharp icicles, enough to do some serious damage to whoever gets in his way. Insector: If things get too bad, I'm retreating to my box. Booze: Enough of this useless banter! CHARGE!!! GameBuddy: HEY GUYS! WAIT FOR ME!!! *Team ALPHA* Celest: Will someone PLEASE help Boz put his glasses on!? KaDo: Sure, I'll do it. Taking the pair of glasses from Boz's tiny T-Rex arms, KaDo jumped up on to Boz's face, placing the glasses in a suitable position. The team looked at Boz confused, for they had never seen a T-Rex wearing a pair of glasses before. Boz: At last! I can see... uh oh. Boz looked towards the tear. Whatever was outside was now coming in. Celest: NO, NOT THIS!! Chio: Oh great, this is all we need. Jake: For the love of god, no! Emerging from the tear came a youtube video. Crudely recorded by a ten year old using his webcam, the sound was appalling, as was the video quality. 'VOTE 5' was anotated all over it in an attempt to get higher ratings. The team new of monstrosities like this and had done so much to remove them from existance. This... was Sonic Shorts... on youtube! Chio: Flag it! FLAG IT NOW!!! Gamebuddy GameBuddy trips and falls on his face in an attempt to catch up with the team of people closest to him. Tears start to well up in his puppy dog eyes and he reaches into his pocket for his Nintendo DSi, hoping that those 30 Seconds to Mars albums were still on his SD card. He needed some music that would make him hurt on the inside. Unfortunately, he'd filled up the SD cards with voice clips of himself so he decided to take some pictures of the TEAM BITA's mighty noob battle with his mighty point-three megapixel camera. GameBuddy: These are gonna look so freaking awesome on Twitter. But as he pressed the shoulder button to take a snapshot, a noob dove in the way and ruined the picture. GameBuddy: He what's wrong with you, ya-- But the noob didn't move, it was frozen solid with a look of horror on its face. GameBuddy was perplexed, but then flipped the DSi around and looked at the cartridge in the slot. It was the original Trauma Center game, and GameBuddy had been playing the Final Challenge, which was quite possibly one of the hardest mother fathering things in all of gaming history. You see, plenty of noobs played vidjya games, but few were actually any good at it, and even fewer played anything that didn't have Master Chefs or Super Plumb Mans in them, so when exposed to the raw energy of such a challenging niche title as Trauma Center, their puny brains cannot comprehend the dexterity required to play the game, so they freeze up; sometimes forever, sometimes for thirty seconds. GameBuddy: Hey, guys! Lookit! GameBuddy ran straight into the fray of battle, snapping photos of as many noobs as he could, giving the mods and admins the precious time needed to conjure up their permabans. *Will GameBuddy find a team that wants him? Will TEAM BITA defeat DarkRyal? Will TEAM ALPHA fax YouTube a paper and gain access to the copyright infringement tool? Will Twitter eventually replace blogging? YOU DECIDE* Category:Transcript